Langoustines linguistiques

This is a by-no-means-exhaustive list of the most silly French words I've learnt so far:

Diaporama = slideshow
Strapontin = fold-down seat (I know I've told you this one before but I just think it's fab)
Pif = nose
Avocat = either avocado (logical) or solicitor (less logical)
Manchot = either penguin or one-armed (as in "un manchot manchot", obviously. Have needed this one on an almost daily basis)

And here are some of my favourite slang phrases:

Clean(ish)
C'est terrible = it's fantastic
C'est enorme = it's hilarious
Grave! = I jolly well agree
Mince = Damnit
La vache! = Bloody hell!

Just plain vulgar
Tu me fais chier = you're pissing me off (literally "you make me shit". Nice)
J'ai rien a foutre = I've got nothing to do (translates literally as "I've got nothing to f***")
Tu te fous de ma geule? = Are you making fun of me? ("Are you f***ing me in the mouth"?!)

A little extreme under the circumstances those last three I'm sure you'll agree...

I was also filling in a programming spreadsheet thingy at work today and it asked me for the length and position of the tampon. And I thought French was the language of romance...



And so, Mesdames, Messieurs, here ends my unexpectedly crude (but very colourful) post...